I find it difficult to hold back my true feelings as I’m usually transparent in voicing my opinion. However, as I entered the business world, I realized it is important to keep certain opinionated comments to myself no matter how great of an urge I have to share them.
More often than not, problems stem from sharing negative opinions. If the negative opinion is on something unimportant, it’s better to avoid discussing it.
During my shift, a teammate pulled me out of my work area to gather and wish another member a farewell. Considering I had never met the other member, I expected to be back in my section soon. However, it was a full meeting with all members.
I remained with everyone, barely speaking and eating a bit of cake. I had some activities I wanted to do in my section that couldn’t be attended due to this farewell event and that negatively impacted my mood. My coworkers not having the same humor as me on top of that didn’t help.
I observed the room and noticed everyone smiling and laughing. They really loved this team member and wanted to show it by dedicating time for him. He clearly deserved it.
Parting from this observation, I realized it was one of those times I had to suck it up. This took a lot of effort due to the inconveniences my being there caused but this event wasn’t about me. It was about that member and showing appreciation for his time working with the team.
Out of respect, I didn’t say a word. However, I’m sure it was written all over my face that I wanted to leave.
I wasn’t too happy that day to begin with as I had paid for the entire team’s meal for a hefty bill of $200+ as a new hire and was not thanked. They didn’t call me to eat with them altogether either. As a result, my perception of the team was that they were ungrateful people and that made it even more difficult to tuck away my feelings of discomfort.
Why did I spend that much on the team?
Well, I didn’t intend to. Another member offered to buy everyone Osmows through Uber Eats earlier and then when it came down to pay, his credit card got declined. It happens. Any new hire in my position though would offer to pay like myself, especially when we haven’t fully had a chance to connect with everyone yet.
Later only was I informed that most of the team wasn’t aware that I had paid for the meals and the bill could be reimbursed by the company. Had I known this information, I wouldn’t have been too grumpy that night. Maybe they would’ve thanked me afterall.
I am glad I didn’t get on anyone’s nerves or cause a ruckus for the “maltreatment” as it would’ve led to a lot of confusion. I must admit, the team member responsible for providing me with this information regarding reimbursement and notifying the team that I had paid, doesn’t have too well of an impression on me.
However, before internally despising the guy, I considered his point of view and thought, maybe he was embarrassed his card got declined and didn’t want the team to know. At this point, I had already announced that I wanted a reimbursement. This was because I already reached out to him personally and he hadn’t told me of the process yet so I figured if the team knew, he would be more timely with his responses.
If the problem was that his card declined and he was embarrassed by it, I hope he realizes it’s common for people to not monitor their credit cards. I used to work in front-line retail and the number of times customers had to pay in cash because their credit card was declined is incredibly high. It’s. No. Big. Deal.
Though I understand where he is coming from, I still believe he wasn’t considerate of my feelings as a new hire.
What would have been better in this situation is if I had immediately addressed the problem without any kind of anger or negativity. At the time, I decided not to speak up and resorted to passive aggressiveness which is almost just as bad since it probably led to confusion from any team member that noticed my facial expressions.
I must practice addressing issues that bother me instinctively before letting any initial negative impressions cloud my judgement. Voicing my opinion on whether or not I’m having a good time though is not necessary to address when the majority is happy. It just kills the positive buzz that people need daily for their mental health.
Do you agree with these lessons? Let me know what you would recommend in this situation! Thank you for reading!
Founder and Managing Director at Parting Stories
Operations, Manager I at Amazon
BBA graduate from Schulich School of Business at York University
Certified PS Writer